Fragile Heart
by hurricaneblast
Summary: It was all a long time ago, when Natsume Hyuuga broke up with Mikan Sakura-Except for two people who still hold feelings for each other, how hard is it to let go? NxM
1. Invitation

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gakuen Alice.

* * *

**CHAPTER 1- INVITATION**

We broke up.

-And it was a such a long, long time ago that I shouldn't even have been affected by any of it. His well-practiced charms that swept me off my feet, the sound of his smooth voice and the strange, mystic draw of his crimson eyes - I shouldn't have felt any of it.

Damn me, because I still did.

I always dreamt to be with someone who cared for me, treasure me and loved me enough to be together with me. And honestly, I thought he was _the_ one. I always thought it was us against the world together and all that fairy tale stuff. Who was I kidding? There were no happily-ever-afters. Yes, everyone, television and the media in particular, lied.

I loved him that much that everytime I remembered the break-up, my eyes would get all watery and my heart would ache like it had been repeatedly stabbed by a piercing knife with a sharp blade. When they told me it wouldn't last, I thought I was going to prove them wrong. Too late, because before I knew it, he walked away while I was left with a broken heart.

It just wasn't fair.

Why could I be so aware of him, when he obviously never cared for me? I didn't want to be affected. I _refused_ to be affected. I kept telling myself he wasn't someone worth pondering about, because it would be such an enormous waste of time. I kept telling myself to stay away, because I'll only end up hurting myself. Heck, that's what everyone else said. Too bad my stupid heart didn't listen. It still didn't want to believe that it was all over and he broke up with me, and worst of all, at that time, he didn't even look like he felt bad for me or that he regretted any of it.

But that was over. Except for the life of me, I couldn't understand why the hell he still tried to establish some connection. He ended us, so shouldn't I have the right to my own peace. I deserved that much at least, didn't I?

My jaw dropped upon seeing the invitation on my door. It was there, hanging on the door knob like some "Do not disturb sign", and I wasn't pleased at all at the creativity, or rather, lack thereof. I had no idea what the hell Natsume Hyuuga was thinking, but to give me an invitation, it was like he was planning an evil scheme. I knew only too well never to trust him.

Apparently, he thinks it's funny to give an invitation that way. I tugged the invitation off the knob until the string snapped, and without pausing to hesitate, I chucked it in the rubbish bin.

It was his party, and I so didn't want to come. At least, that was what I kept on telling myself, not that any of the persuasion worked. I just didn't belong in his world anymore. Maybe I never did, and I was just too blind to realize any of that.

The moment I came to class, he was already there, as if waiting for me. I ended such illusions in an instant, knowing that they were never true. This was Natsume Hyuuga, you might as well snap out of your ridiculous wild thoughts. He'd be with you, he'd dump and he'd hurt you. End of story.

"Did you get the invitation?" he asked, a smirk on his face. It bothered me how someone so good-looking could be allowed to exist and break people's hearts.

"No. I threw it away," I simply told him, but he grabbed my arm suddenly, and narrowed his eyes. "No you didn't."

"What's the matter, Natsume? Can't stand me dumping a stupid invitation?" It was funny. He could just break toss people aside, but throwing the invitation seemed to affect him.

"I'd like you to come," he told me bluntly.

I glared at him. "The hell I will."

I pulled my arm free and walked away- at least I still had dignity left.

I hated him.

So deeply, so intensely that I could probably hate him again and again and I knew I could never hate him_ enough_.

So why did I go as far as so search for it in the the trash can? Why did I find myself crying and hugging the envelope like a life preserver?

I stared at the date printed neatly in black bold letters and numbers, even if I knew I didn't have to. I practically had the date engraved on my mind and could recite it like a phone number. I knew the date so well, an invitation was like an insult for a reminder. It was next week, and even though I didn't want to, I knew it'd kill me to know when it was, but not go.

_I'm not going. I'm not going. _My phone rang, waking me from the deep thoughts that engulfed my mind. I quickly checked the caller ID before answering.

_"Y_ou're not going, Mikan, right?" Permy's voice blared through the earpiece, worried. "Right?" she reiterated. I was surprised by the sudden question, and appreciated the worry that filled her voice when finding out I had the invitation.

"I don't know Permy," I answered honestly. I know I shouldn't care and I shouldn't come, but I know that wasn't true. I know I shouldn't like him, but that wasn't true either.

"But why? He hurt you."

'Why' is a good question. I knew I didn't have a proper answer. Even why he invited me kept circling around my head non-stop.

"Believe me, I've asked myself that many times."

"Mikan, you're my friend, and don't get me wrong, but I've seen you be under his _spell_ before, and it didn't come out good."

I knew she was only being a good friend, but I wanted to tell her that I wanted to go just this once. Perhaps it was to test my limits and my foolishness, or maybe it was to see how we were miles apart, so I can finally snap out of any of the feelings I still held for him.

"I know, Permy. I'm sorry. I... Need to go."

She sighed. "When you come back to me crying, I'm not going to hold back in saying 'I told you so'."

"Thanks. You're the best."

"I mean it, Mikan. It's not a good idea to stick with him. If you only weren't so stubborn..."

"I know. I'll be careful," I promised her.

* * *

I don't know why I found myself sitting here, alone with the loud music, and everybody dancing around with the beat and rhythm, having fun.

Even as I claimed I hated him many times than I could count, I was still here, staring at him like an idiot. How could he stand there and still have a hypnotic draw, like I was still _his_? He had no right to me anymore. He lost it when he left me and toyed with my heart. To him, I was just a trophy. Someone to display and brag about to his so-called friends.

Why did I even come? To watch as everybody had something to be happy about, while I was frozen in this... this state? Hoping but never really believing? I had friends who cared about me, and I had a life that I should be enjoying right now.

"Enjoying the party?" he asked, movie-star glance.

I hated _myself_ for wanting him for even a second. For allowing myself to be lost in the feel of his presence and the weight of his gaze.

"Why did you invite me, Natsume?" I asked straight-forwardly. What was his reason for even asking me out? I just wanted to know. To finally end it all.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "I just thought you'd be bored."

This man was unbelievable. He could just say words, not regarding how others felt, and he could just say it without a care in the world. How could something such as being 'bored' ever count as a reason?

"I'm_ not bored_. You want to know how I feel? I'm sick and tired of it. You said you'd end everything, but you never did. I don't like dangling helplessly in doubt. I _want_ to _know_."

There. I confronted him, after all this time. I felt a deep sense of satisfaction to have had told him. I wasn't freed- far from that, but I've always wanted to know the reason he never fully let go. I wanted to hear it right from his lips. I just wanted to know the truth.

"Sakura, when I invited you to my party, I didn't mean I wanted a nagging girlfriend."

So help me, I slapped him. Hard across the face, even with all his guests staring.

"Ex-girlfriend," I corrected. "And I should've done that a long time ago."

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**Made on a whim- I only have a slight idea on where this is going. Any reviews would be appreciated! ^^**


	2. Handcuff

**CHAPTER 2- HANDCUFF**

-

-

"Let me get this straight," Permy said with a look of incredulity, "You said you were just going to the party, but now you're telling me you slapped Natsume Hyuuga right in the face," she confirmed, disapproval outlining her tone.

I simply nodded and covered my face in humiliation. What had I just done?

"You should've told me to come," Hotaru said with a smirk. "That would've made me a lot of money."

"This is hardly the time for blackmailing," Sumire said, shaking her head. "You. Slapped. _The_. Natsume. Hyuuga. Really, Mikan, you're unbelievable." I couldn't tell if it was awe or disbelief, maybe it was a mixture of both.

The memory of last night made me run away as if in desperate need of escape. There were lots of staring, and all I wanted to do was melt into the ground. I probably shouldn't have run like a coward, but it was all my feet could do. The beat of the music still rang through my ear, as if it didn't want me to forget. Even now, as I sat with Hotaru and Permy, I could still practically hear it, buzzing like a fly.

I only hoped I wouldn't encounter Natsume today. I was entirely uncomfortable after what happened last night. Knowing him, he was definitely not pleased about it.

* * *

"Polka."

"Pervert."

He only smirked wider. I took a different turn.

"Where do you think you're going, Polka?"

I ignored the comment at the end and stated the obvious.

"To the classroom," I answered confidently.

"That's the _cafeteria_."

And it was, I realized too late. The familiar red swinging door with a rectangular glass, where I could see the recently cleaned tables and tucked-in chairs. I guess I hadn't been paying attention much to where I was going...

"I was... Well, I was hungry, so..." I was here, I might as well just enter. But before I pushed the doors, Natsume held back the knob and for the briefest second our hand had contact, it sent a jot of electricity between us.

"About last night," he said, his voice sounding dangerously close, I couldn't turn my head. "_No one_, not even an _ex-girlfriend_ of mine has _ever_ done that to me."

I finally relaxed when he moved away.

"And Polka, don't think you're getting away with it." It startled me for a second, and I had to recover. What had just passed between us? Did he feel it too? I shook my head. It was only me. After all, it always had been.

I turned around. "Next time, don't bother wasting any paper. I'm not coming."

"But you came." My cheeks flushed a deep red.

"It was a mistake. I should've just burnt it." Then I turned on my heel and began to walk away. I knew I shouldn't have went. I should've listened to Sumire and stayed. That would've been the wiser decision.

* * *

"You want me to work with him? No. No no no, that is _so_ not happening." I crossed my arms stubbornly, like a six-year old.

"And you think I'd want to work with you?" Natsume said defiantly.

"Mr. Narumi requested it," said Ruka with a shrug.

"I'm not a bloody _organizer_. Get someone else," Natsume told Ruka.

"It's only a welcoming event, Natsume. It wouldn't hurt to try it out. At least Mikan's willing," Ruka said, turning to me.

"Oh, that's very funny," I scowled at him to get the message across. "It I. am. Not. Working. With. Him. Bye."

"But wait!"

If I knew any better, it was another plan for me and Natsume to work together. Ruka and Hotaru had always been planning some schemes to get me and Natsume back together- which was why I'd usually talk to Sumire about me and Natsume, since she understood me and gave me advice. Not that Hotaru and Ruka didn't understand, but they claimed it was a 'waste' because apparently, "I've been watching you to long to see you guys break-up." They couldn't seem to grasp the fact that it was over between us.

"Sorry, Ruka-pyon. I'm really busy at the moment," I deadpanned.

"Natsume, Sakura-san... I'm sorry." Before I knew it, he held what looked like a handcuff and put it on Natsume's wrist, and then on mine.

"Eh?! What is this?" I tried to pull my wrist free, but I was stuck. With Natsume Hyuuga.

I examined the cuffs to see if there was anything I could use to pick the lock- except-

"It's useless, Polka."

"What?" I panicked.

"There is no lock."

- And he was right. It looked like there was no way to take it off. The thought dawned to me: I was going to be stuck with Natsume._ Forever_.

"But how can that be?!" I exclaimed, already on the verge of tears.

"Stop moving. It's really annoying."

_This is bad. This is bad_. My heart pounded wildly on my chest. I couldn't stay here longer... Because if I was being honest to myself, I loved him. Still do. I felt like I'd explode with the emotions I've been feeling. And I wasn't going to let my mind linger on the past that was long over. He hurt me and left me. So why do I still feel this way? I knew he wasn't worth it, and still my heart wouldn't keep quiet. Then I realized someone was playing with the ends of my hair.

"No!" I backed away the furthest I could. - Which was before I realized we were handcuffed together. Every touch, ever gesture, it made my heart stutter with aching intensity. And everytime it did, I hated myself for feeling that way. Upon instinct, my response would be to get the furthest I possibly can from him, before I ended up hurting myself.

"You've always been like that," he said, reflecting.

"Excuse me?"

"Everytime I approach you, you always look so scared."

I was startled for a brief moment, at his observation.

"Scared?"

"Even before," he said, "in my missions, it was as if I'd go off and kill myself. I'm not going to die, _baka_. This... I have no idea why you keep on running away." His fingers bent closer to my face, and my eyes widened in shock.

"_Don't touch m_e."

His hand instantly dropped down, and he leaned his head back on the cold wall, his face blank. "See what I mean?"

"_You_ did this to me," I said, my tone accusing. I was scared, because he was playing me. Because he left me, and I knew that none of this all-encompassing feeling meant anything to him. I was scared none of this was real anymore, and I wanted to believe as much as I could that everything that passed through us was _real_.

"Maybe you're right," he admitted. He didn't say anything after that, which left me wondering what he really meant by those words. It felt like there was something more... Here, with his eyes closed, looking peaceful and carefree, he... He didn't look so bad.

"Something on my face?" came his mocking voice. _Unbelievable._

Did this guys have extra eyes somewhere in his head or what? I swear, he always seemed to know everything."As if," I shot back. His eyes snapped open, a fiery look of crimson, boring right through me, sending my heart fluttering.

"I knew you'd be back sooner or later."

"Bastard." Never, never again. If a miracle happens and I'd somehow break free, I would avoid him like the plague.

"Hotaru," I said, realizing that she was the only one who could fix this. "Natsume, Hotaru can get this off."

After a few moments where I was startlingly close to tripping, and after a couple of comments on my clumsiness, we finally got to see Hotaru. She was admiring her new invention, which looked like another sort of gun, intimidating in size.

"Hotaru! Get this off meeee!" I pleaded her, already crying. Being Natsume made me feel all sorts of different things, it wasn't even funny. I wanted to break free already.

"Mikan-chan!" Mr. Narumi approached us, beaming. "I want to know if both of you can still do it. If it's not much of a bother, I'd really like it if you can help with organizing the welcoming event for the new students."

"They'll be _pleased _to do it together. Aren't you, Mikan?" Hotaru said, a wicked grin spread across her face. So much for my plans to avoid Natsume.

Sly, sly girl.

* * *

**Um. Kinda bored here, so yeah. I'm updating. Yay. I think. I'm sorry if it's bad, my brain stopped functioning for a while, but at least it's working now. xD **

**Review, anyone?**


	3. Working Together

**CHAPTER 3- WORKING TOGETHER**

-

-

I never intended to hurt her.

The way her big brown eyes widened with warmth and how her bright smile would light up her face- It was the only thing I needed to give me strength for my missions. If she thought she didn't mean anything to me, she was dead wrong. She asked me before why I didn't end anything, and I knew I already had my answer. She was worth it, so damn worth it, that I couldn't let her go. Yet I knew, behind those smiles and fears, I didn't deserve her anymore.

"Hotaru's not being fair! She said she'd take it off at the end of the day." Her cheeks flushed bright pink, and I watched as her eyes glinted with a look of sudden realization. "Oh no, what if I needed to go to the bathroom?!" She shifted her gaze to me, almost hesitantly.

"Can't you, you know, _burn it off_?" She wasn't being serious, was she?

"You want metal to burn on your skin? Let's just get this whole thing over and done with." There was little space between the two circular metals around our wrists that it would almost be impossible for it not to get to the skin. Her response was only an annoyed look.

"I _know_ that, but I can hardly type properly when you try to move the mouse."

We were typing some information in for the brochures we'd soon have to print out. No, it didn't help that we could barely move. It took us about ten minutes to even get seated and start using the computer. Given our own pace without the stupid cuff, things would be much, much more efficient. Not that I minded being next to her much...

"Oh for goodness sake, Natsume, you don't have to keep clicking things every 10 seconds!"

"I value my formatting," I said, moving my hand more. "It's just never the right size..."

"_Never the right size_? You changed it from 13 to 13.5! What the hell's the _difference?_"

"I like accuracy."

"_Accuracy_ is a waste of time. You do realize we were only given _two _days for _everything_?" she said, panicking already.

"_Relax_, Polka," I replied in a bored voice. She was fussing too much about it. "The whole world isn't going to stop spinning." Always worrying about every damn thing- she looked so- fragile. She should keep a clear head sometimes, maybe it'd help with the clumsiness...

"You have no idea how much we've got to do, do you?" she said with a frustrated sigh as she bent back to lean on the chair, facing the ceiling.

"I do. Being anxious isn't going to help."

"What do you want me to do, celebrate? Yeah, that'd type things out for us," she uttered sarcastically. As if she realized the proximity was entirely too close, she quickly moved back, like a simple stare electrified her.

"Hey-"

"Nooo!" Once more, she moved away from me, as much as her arm would allow.

"You're doing it again. Do I look like the Swine Flu?" I muttered sardonically.

"Oh, you're definitely much worse."

"Fighting again?" Ruka entered with a disappointed voice, along with Koko. I was both relieved and annoyed at the interruption. Relieved, because I hated seeing her cry, most of all. Annoyed, because I was about to say another clever response. "We brought food and drinks, maybe you'd like to have a break..." But before he even finished, I already grabbed the food from Ruka, while Polka took the drinks from Koko, and we left the room on separate doors- her to the left, me to the right.

"There's an office where you two could eat," Ruka called out. My best friend should've been on my side. Hell, he wasn't just on her side, he still wanted us together. He should've just left things alone, but he listened too much to Imai.

* * *

"So, I think peach fits it better. Oh, and it should also start at 5:00 pm. Are you even listening?" Her eyebrows furrowed in irritation. It was a terribly long speech, I could've fallen asleep here. I almost wanted to, just to see how she'd react, but if I push her any more, she'd probably start getting all violent.

"_Peach?" _No, it wasn't even lavender or a shade of pink. It had to be peach. "What are we organizing, a slumber party? Try a blue one."

"Didn't you listen to what I just said? I think it should have a dainty color. Blue is too common."

I glared at her. No bloody way she's making anything peach. "Not happening."

She took another bite on her burger, a worried expression evident on her face. "Natsume, we'd have to agree on something, or this is never going to end."

"I have an idea," I told her, bending nearer, knowing how she'd try to get further. Her eyes widened on the proximity. "The invitations are blue, it's starting at 6:30 pm, and you're wearing a nice dark dress."

Did I really hear it or did I imagine the racing of her heart, audible from the distance? She quickly recovered, and she flushed once again, realizing what I just said.

"_Excuse me?_ What does my choice of dress have anything to do with it?"

"It fits the occasion," I said with a smirk. "It's 3:00 pm. We should get going." She quickly nodded and I heard the scrape of the chair as her light footsteps came in an increasing pace.

"Don't walk too fast," she said, exasperated as she struggled to keep up. Oh, right. Our hands were stuck, thanks to the metal that stuck us together.

"Hi Natsume-kun," Luna Koizumi said sweetly as she walked past. Except I didn't notice her until she called my name, my eyes still fixed on the idiot to my right, who was still having difficulty keeping up. Hurt, Koizumi turned back to her friend to talk once more. I slowed down my pace to make it a little easier for her, when she spoke.

"You should've said hi back, you know. It was rude." I didn't realize she'd been talking to me, until those warm eyes stared right at me.

Always butting in other people's business. In truth, I could have anyone. There were a lot of confessions and promises of 'lifetime dedication', but I didn't want any of them. Why couldn't she understand that I wanted no one but her? After her, there was no one else.

"I don't care about her." The last time I talked to Luna Koizumi, all she seemed to care about was everyone who was seeing us converse, not really caring much about where the conversation was going. She'd also stare all the time, much to my chagrin. I knew that the moment she talked to her 'friends', all they'd do was some ridiculous fangirl squealing.

"You should. She's one of your_ precious _fans," she exaggerated.

"You jealous?" I mocked. Of course, I knew she'd deny once more, and her face would reveal different emotions. The thing about the idiot was that her face was just so easy to read.

"_Jealous_? Is your name 'Conceit'? 'Cause you're full of it."

It was one of the things I liked about her: she didn't swoon, drool, squeal or suck up, unlike those fangirls that greeted me with deafening squeals each morning. Mikan was just Mikan- she didn't care about popularity or good looks or any of those things. Yes, she might've looked plain to other people, but to me, she always had a presence and optimism that seemed to make everything else melt away.

Once we arrived on the room, we stood there, gaping on the computer, the idiot's mouth wide open. The windows on the computer screen we worked on were both closed. "Natsume, tell me you saved everything," she whispered hoarsely.

"Of course I did." I quickly walked, forcing her to follow too, almost stumbling from my speed. I did a few clicks, when I waited for the file to load.

A few seconds later, what faced us was a blank screen with a wallpaper of the sparkling ocean, with all we typed, mysteriously gone.

* * *

**Natsume's POV, yay! ^^ Now off to start chapter 4.... **

**Thanks to all those who reviewed so far!**


	4. A Change of Date

**CHAPTER 4- A CHANGE OF DATE**

-

-

(RUKA- POV)

When news broke that Natsume and Mikan were together, everyone fussed about it. Everyone envied their closeness and how they were simply inseparable.

- Which was why when they broke up, everyone couldn't help but question the reasons why. No one could understand how those two people could ever break-up, because the mere mention of it was just unthinkable.

Quite obviously, he still felt something for her. I knew my best friend too well to know that there was a greater reason behind it. I could have a guess as to why did it - but I'm just not quite satisfied with such reasoning- So I made it my daily mission to do a little something to end that separating divider between them.

Turned out they were both idiots. They were too stubborn, which made it that much harder to quit.

"They had break together," I reported cheerfully.

"As long as they haven't resolved past issues, they would never have a peaceful conversation," Hotaru muttered percebtibly. "And knowing Mikan... I wonder if Hyuuga would be deaf by the end of today..."

I rolled my eyes at the exaggeration.

Mikan's voice could be heard from the outside, and I could already tell they were arguing. Again. Well, nothing really new about it. It was, after all, Natsume and Mikan. That was already to be expected. Together or not, that was the thing they seem to both do well on and still do.

"- said you saved it!" she said, with a panicky voice.

"I don't make those sorts of mistakes, Polka, and stop screeching."

Both Hotaru and me went outside to see what was going on.

"Did you do it?" Natsume suddenly asked, turning to me.

"What? Did what?" I asked curiously. Natsume was angry, and why, well, I could think of a couple of reasons why...

"Did you, or did you not delete the files on our computer?" Uh-oh. Hell broke lose. But the files got deleted? ... Interesting.

"It got deleted?" I asked in mild interest.

Next to me, Hotaru's lips curved into a distinct smile. She looked at the watch in her wrist, and counted silently. "Three, two, one." Within a snap, the handcuffs broke.

"Breaks within four hours of use," she said. Mikan moved her wrist freely and rubbed her eyes, as if she couldn't believe she was finally free from it.

"Imai. You deleted it. And you planned this?" They were both facing each other, and even from my side, I could practically feel the anger from Natsume and the uh, wickedness of Hotaru.

The devil vs. the devil. I wonder who'd win.

"I don't involve myself in cheap tactics, Hyuuga, but it's nice to know you don't underestimate my abilities."

"Natsume, that's enough. Hotaru's my best friend, you shouldn't be accusing her of anything," Mikan said, standing in between both of them. No, no, Mikan, don't stand there. Really, does she want to get killed? She must've seen Natsume this angry, and she must know it's never pleasant if he...

"Babble all you want. I'm calling a mind-reader. Gather everyone who entered the office from 2:30 to 3:00 pm," he told me, then walked away.

"M-me?" I stammered in surprise.

I only stood there, eyeing Mikan in awe. No one, and I say no one, from all that I know about Natsume, can ever take that anger away but Mikan. That was one of the things why I thought they should be together. Mikan looked really hurt, too, when Natsume left. The two definitely needed to be together.

"What- What's with him?" she said, cross.

"So everything was gone?" Hotaru asked, deep in thought. When she made that face, I knew she was probably planning something. Or maybe trying to solve the mystery of the deleted text. God, what was I turning into? First, matchmaking, now some creepy narrator- Hotaru was right.

Mikan only nodded. "What am I going to do now? I hope we can figure it out soon. We don't even have that much time."

I knew Hotaru didn't do it, so it only made me wonder who came in and out of that room... "Right. Which reminds me, I need to get going."

* * *

"Is this everyone?" Natsume asked, rather impatiently. There weren't much, only about three other people, who were all asking why they were called out. Apparently they've had a busy day, and they were interrupted from their 'important work'.

"Yeah, maybe except Koko, but I take it you've already called him?"

"Of course."

"Is there anything wrong? Why did you call us here?" Mr. Narumi asked with an obvious worry.

"Someone deleted the files," he replied gruffly. I've been reassuring and told Mr. Narumi nothing was wrong, only to have Natsume turn everyone else pessimistic. Nice one, Natsume.

The whole room went silent when Koko entered. He looked pretty nervous, eyes wandering around the room. "Great air-conditioning," he commented.

"Start," Natsume ordered.

"I can explain."

"Explain later. Identify the culprit."

"Not... among them..."

"But that's impossible! I'm sure those were the only people who entered," I protested, unable to believe that no one here deleted it. Unless it was some technical problem? No, it couldn't have been. Perhaps someone else did it...

"Does Imai know?" he asked Koko, who shook his head. "Er... The truth is, I..."

"Yes?"

"I... I've got a lot of work to do, and the culprit doesn't seem to be here, so..."

The glare was like a magical spell, because in a flash, Koko began confessing.

"It was an accident! When all the text was gone, I was just looking around the room and I thought you came back, but it was Ruka, and I closed the window and I didn't read the s- stupid... pop-up." His voice trailed off as he looked at an enraged Natsume.

"I see."

This was just getting worse and worse.

"Uh, everyone, I don't think it's a good idea to still stay inside."

Everyone followed me out.

* * *

-MIKAN'S POV-

-I sighed as I sat comfortably back in the desk. I wanted to lay my head on the table and just sleep. Of course, I quickly got rid of the thought when I remembered the deadline. We had to work with twice the effort, and I knew it wasn't going to be easy.

"Now this is much better," I commented at our freed wrists. We could work at a much faster pace now that we weren't stuck together. There was no way we could get our work back with Koko's admission. We were just glad nothing was burnt.

But hell, we were still in the same room AND we _weren't_ arguing. There was something definitely wrong. He quietly typed and I took a brief glance at his direction.

He looked absorbed in his work, that I didn't think for a second if he noticed it or not. Our eyes connected and I shivered at the intensity of his gaze. There was no mistaking the significant increase of my heartbeat, either, and I hated the way I was so affected by merely a glance. I turned away.

"Any reason you've been staring?" he asked me with a smile I knew, was made to irritate me.

I blushed, and typed quicker, only to have more errors on the document. _Dammit. _I would definitely feel relieved once this whole thing was over. I began to fix a few things and change the formatting. Thinking I was ready, I clicked 'print'.

Once the first copy went out, Natsume took it off the printer and briefly looked at the first copy and pressed the cancel button without hesitation.

"Fix it."

"What?!"

"Yellow doesn't stand out well with a pale blue as a background. And 'appreciate" has a 'c', baka. You should've used spellcheck."

And that... That was how the next worst forty minutes of my life began.

10 minutes later

"I said to change the color, not to reformat the whole text."

10 minutes later on

"You didn't have to make the text box bigger."

10 minutes later, later on.

"Better now?" I said, aggravated.

"Adjust the spacing."

10 minutes later, later, later on.

I was completely fed-up- He just wasted _forty _minutes of my time. If he wasn't satisfied with this, I don't know what to do.

"You should've used thicker paper." I swear, I'm beginning to think he's doing all that to annoy the heck out of me. - And it was working.

"Oh,_ now_ you're telling me?" It was just like 'Yeah, everything in the content looks perfect, let's move on to the paper?!'

"Tell you what, why don't you do the whole thing then?! This one looks completely different to the first copy!" I said, looking at both the original and the current one. I guess it had been his plan from the beginning. I opened a new window to check incoming emails. There was a new message from Mr. Narumi, with entitled "Urgent deadline Notice". I clicked it and waited for it to load.

"With its original state, no one would even bother looking," Natsume said

- Except I wasn't listening anymore. My eyes widened. It was only one life and straight to the point, but it wasn't _good_ news.

-

-

_I'm sorry, but we needed to have a slight change of plans. Deadline changed. Tomorrow at your arranged time._

_-_

_-_

_

* * *

  
_

**Okay, not the best chapter, but I tried.**

**Ruka's POV at first. .. Because I tried to do Mikan's POV twice, and failed. xD**


	5. Invisible Line

**CHAPTER 5- INVISIBLE LINE**

-

-

Sitting on the leather seat and swinging my legs in utter frustration, I went back and reviewed the to-do list I made, in which Natsume teased me about. He could probably use the tiniest thing to think up of a never-ending list to annoy me. Every minute with him felt like it'd suffocate me, crush me, and I desperately clung on to the belief that everything was going to be fine. This would all end soon.

The date was changed, and still, I was sitting here, thinking of him.

"Dammit, this isn't helping."

I threw the paper across the desk lightly, and stood up, arms crossed, a slight frown forming on my forehead. Where was that guy, anyway? Fifteen minutes ago, he said he was just going to replace the ink on the printer, and he still wasn't back.

I twirled the pen and decided to check my phone for any messages. There was one message from Permy asking me if I was busy, because apparently, she planned to go out today.

-I checked the clock. Twenty minutes by now.

A thought circled my mind, and I typed one line:

_Natsume you pervert!! If this works, I'm going to kill you._

Ah, that should do. I made it a size 32, bold, just in case. I clicked the print button, and the truth was like a kick in the gut. He lied- It wasn't low on ink. The words were printed clearly in black letters. The bastard decided to run away.

I decided to go out, itching for a break. Deciding not to bring any bag, in a few minutes time, I left the room and shut the door soundlessly- and met a girl from my class before. I've seen her before, too, because she was one of Natsume's fangirls. She smiled at me warmly and greeted me. After the exchange, I expected her to walk along, except she stayed.

"You're lucky, Mikan. All the girls that would kill to get your position," she commented.

I laughed humorlessly. "I wouldn't say that. He's an arrogant, conceited moron who lied about having no ink to run away from the work."

"You were together before," she said, face reflective. "You both seemed really happy. Don't you even think of him at all right now?" She giggled. "How about the old fashioned getting stuck on an elevator thing? Have you confronted each other yet?"

Um... I could only stare at her as if she was crazy.

"Trust me, we need to get many things done today and the last thing I need is to get stuck with him on a freaking elevator. We've just been handcuffed together for three hours, and it didn't turn out so well."

"I don't know why you dislike him so much."

"Try getting dumped as if you never mattered."

I've had enough talking to a person who only thought of one side of the issue. Girls ran after him, even before. Sometimes they would attempt to treat me badly in class, but Hotaru and Natsume would always be there.

I froze when I realized Natsume was standing silently on the corner, arms crossed.

"Polka-dots."

He was already there, with a bored look, and damn that hair of his that covered his eyes. He looked too good, I had to turn away or I'd shatter my resolve.

How long had he been standing there? Did he hear me talk to that girl?

"I wondered when you'd finally come out, no-star." Wondered, did he? Probably made fun of me too.

"The ink isn't empty or even near empty. Some partner you are." I glared at him as he approached.

"Glad you caught up on that." Then he held out his hand to give out something, and I jerked back instinctively.

"What are you-"

"A drink," he replied curtly. "What, did you think I'd give a bomb or something?" he said with a smirk. I snatched the can defensively and opened the ring pull to take a sip. It was Coke. Cold, icy coke. Just what I needed.

"Thanks," I replied, cautious.

"An _arrogant conceited moron_?" he voiced out flatly. He chuckled and pulled a stray lock and tucked it behind me ear. I flushed a deep pink as he repeated my words. Sgo he heard the conversation a little while ago... "I wasn't the one who jumped up and down the hallway saying 'I got a C'."

"That was over a year ago," I snapped.

He raised his eyebrows. "Of course."

The brief moment out stares connected, realizing he was entirely too close, I panicked.

"We should be getting back," I muttered, moving away in an instant, like the touch burnt me. His warm hands still circled my wrists, and he pulled me closer and into hug. I shut my eyes tightly, willing the pain to subside.

"No," I said firmly. I shouldn't. Couldn't.

"No?" A flash of hurt appeared in his eyes for a split second, before it disappeared into nothing and his face reverted to that cool mask of indifference.

What had I just done?

"Tomorrow," he whispered, his lips brushing my ear, "Keep your hair down."

"I'll keep my hair whatever way I want."

I walked off, back to the room, with all the professionalism I had left.

* * *

"That's not normal." Sumire scrunched up her nose with an expression of apparent disbelief. "You've been working together the whole day-"

"-He left me alone to do work. And lied about the printer."

"Got you a drink-"

"-He made so much_ formatting _complaints."

"He even _complimented_ your hair-"

"He did _not_ compliment my hair!"

"Well it sure sounded like it to me," she said, grinning. "Doesn't it, Hotaru?"

"A clear recording would've been nice proof," Hotaru said back.

I rolled my eyes, while Sumire frowned.

"Point is, how can you just walk away?"

She was the one who told me to be cautious of him- what happened to _that _Sumire?

"You know he left me," I answered softly, hugging my knees. He did it once, so I wasn't about to let it happen again. Couldn't make myself feel it and go through it. Heck, it was part of the past. I shouldn't even be pondering about it now.

"What did I do?" Sumire said innocently, looking back and forth at me and Hotaru.

"You know how she feels about all this," Hotaru hissed.

"Sorry, Mikan," Sumire mumbled back apologetically.

* * *

"Hi, Natsume, Sak- What the hell happened here?" Ruka asked, shocked. I can see what it looked like from his side- messy room, me and Natsume on either side. "Another one?" he uttered in disbelief.

"Isn't it obvious?" Hotaru entered, arms crossed.

"No-star's idea."

"Natsume's fault," I shot back.

* * *

_FLASHBACK_

Going back to the room to work on the files which we kept on backing up since the incident, I went back to sit back, relaxing on the chair.

He shut the door wordlessly and placed a bunch of paper on my desk. First off, I need to set up my own 'safety precautions'. I had to, the way I knew how.

"Listen," I said, placing my foot on the cabinet. "From here, that's your side, this is my side," I said, pointing at the invisible line.

"What are you, three?" he said, ignoring me and crossing.

"What are you doing?!" I tried pushing him back, to no avail.

"Getting the stapler. Now I think I need to get that pen too."

"No, no, that's your side!" I said, flailing my hands helplessly.

"If you feel too bad, you're free to cross my side." I wanted to wipe that irritating smile off his face.

"That's not the point!"

_END OF FLASHBACK_

_

* * *

  
_

"Hotaru, save meeeee," I said, clinging on to her arm.

She shook me off with ease. "You were holding up well. I didn't want to wreck the bonding."

I scowled. Tomorrow, all this would be over. No more precious time wasted in here, no more opportunities for Natsume to annoy me, and no more work and pressure all for one event Hotaru dragged me into.

Over.

And it better be.

* * *

**Okay, I'll write the whole event thing next chapter. Should be fun. ^^**

**Review? You know you want to. xD**


	6. Lingering Feelings

**CHAPTER 6-LINGERING FEELINGS**

-

-**  
**

The sun rose, and my eyes slowly flickered open, as the gentle rays of the sunlight touched my skin. Last night, I could barely keep my eyes open by the time we finished. I was tired and the invisible line between us, the barrier I created, made things even harder. And I thought it was hard being stuck with him- Being separated was just as difficult for the both of us.

I smiled at the to-do list that was now about two-thirds finished. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

Whenever I saw him, it felt like I was about to be ripped apart in two. He made me feel things I didn't want to feel. Shouldn't feel. Like I was tormented by the choice of whether to laugh or cry, torn between two feelings that conflicted me.

I dressed in an elegant deep blue dress that hung up to my knees, the fabric shining with glitter. I wrote high heels, my hair down, loosely curled. I had a mental debate whether or not to add pins to hold hair into place, but then I decided to add pins just to give myself the satisfaction that I didn't completely wear it down, the way he probably would've wanted. Natsume waited for me in the hallway.

The heels I wore clicked loudly on the ground. An annoying sound, but it did match the clothes, as Sumire pointed out earlier. I heaved a sigh as I took my phone out and checked that I had a missed call. Halfway through my next step on the stairs, I missed it, as deeply concentrated on my tiny phone screen as I was.

He caught me before his hand supported my back before I completely stumbled off the stairwell. The tiny gesture was brief, but electric. "Thinking of changing your shoes?"

I frowned, pushing his hand away. "They fit."

"I bet."

There were things we had to do, and it wasn't exactly calming my nerves. "It's my attention that went to the phone, not because of my sh..." I was about to say 'shoes', but then the heat of his gaze made me look away, forcing me to find something more interesting, or pretend to, at least. I needed a change of topic. Fast.

"You backed it up, didn't you? I'd hate to see them get deleted again," I said, trying to change the topic. His only response was a slow smile that crept up his face before he walked down the stairs.

"Of course. I'd _burn_ anyone who goes near them." He almost sounded offended by the reminder.

"I can imagine," I murmured, low enough only for me to hear. Or so I hoped. We walked up to the wide open door of the event venue and then stopped. And stared.

"Can you tell me something?" he growled. "Since when have we been part of the decorating team?"

"I thought we hired people for that."

"Apparently there was some huge traffic." Oh no. No.

I didn't like the sound of that. At all. "I'll never forgive Imai for this." It was the last thing he said before we moved on to do a bit of the decorating ourselves.

* * *

"Somehow I get the feeling they want to push us to an edge." The decorating team arrived, surprised we started without them.

"Well, a bit late for a realization, isn't it?"

I looked around. Arrangements were done, things were kept in place. It was time it got started.

-

-

"Nice," Koko said as he entered. "Very nice. I'm sorry for the deleted files, though."

"We finished on time. Forget about it," I said with a warm smile.

"Get ready for later," Sumire said. Somehow, I felt as if I was missing something vitally important.

"Ready for what?" I asked, bemused.

"Get ready for the after-party," Sumire said with a wink.

"After-party? How come I didn't know about this?!" I said in horror. This was just getting worse and worse. At least I didn't slip and pull the table cloth and bring all food to me, with shattered glasses and stuff. When everybody was eating and the compliments got a bit too much, I decided to leave. They probably wouldn't notice an absence of one person.

I sneaked out for a breath of fresh air, when I felt light footsteps behind me. "Why are you outside?"

I jumped in shock upon hearing the voice. "I- I could say the same." More light footsteps.

"Not really." He held out his phone. "Mr. Organize-the-event-together says he'll be late."

Somehow the news didn't surprise me. He drew nearer and pulled a leaf out from a branch that stuck out on a nearby tree. The proximity knocked me breathless, my knees suddenly feeling weak like jelly. Realizing I was hugging myself, he said, "You're cold-"

-Everything came back to me that very night he broke up. The chilly night, different words, but going towards the same direction: He was going to offer me the jacket, I could tell, and I remembered when I refused it as I walked away, tears stinging my eyes. I shouldn't let it bother me anymore, but the memory was so deeply engraved in my mind, it was hard to push away. I shut my eyes, only allowing myself to_ feel_, as if that'd make reality shrink into the size of a pea.

"You're doing it again," he said, in what sounded like irritation.

"What are you talking about?"

"Am I really so_ despicable_ that you _can't stand _being near me?"

I shook my head violently. "You don't understand."

He crossed his arms, equaling my stubbornness. "Make me."

I gave him a fierce glare in hurt and indignation. "Moron! Do I have to spell it out to you?"

He only waited for a response. "You left. Now you're back and you just won't leave me alone! I'm not anything to you anymore, so why are you still here? Why do you still keep coming back and making me hurt?!" I meant to stop at the second sentence, but I couldn't help myself. He looked surprised at how I lashed out my feelings carelessly, not thinking of the consequences. His eyes were bottomless, thoughtful. What he said next surprised me.

"I didn't want to leave you."

My eyes widened in surprise. "No. I looked at your eyes when you said..." My voice trailed off, unable to continue. "You didn't care for me anymore," I said.

"I do." Do, not did. God, how much was he going to wound my heart?

"No, you don't."

He frowned. "Polka, when I said I do, I wasn't lying."

"You don't." I suppose I just didn't want to hurt more, so I denied it. The sooner I'd believe it was the end of our relationship, the better.

"Don't tell me what I feel," he hissed.

"Don't make me keep hoping, dammit!" I hit him with the bottom of my clenched hands. He held my wrist gently and looked straight at me eyes.

And with that, he bent nearer and kissed me.

It was surrender, hurt and an undeniable attachment all in one. I shouldn't be feeling anything, yet my response said otherwise. My heart sped crazily and all I wanted was to melt into his arms- but then the initial shock wore off, replaced by a slam of hurt and dignity. I couldn't let it happen all over again. I pulled away. How could a kiss feel good and yet hurt?

There was a questioning look into his eyes, but I dared not look any more longer.

"What are you doing, Natsume?" My voice was a whisper in an effort to conceal emotion. I was afraid my voice would crack, and I promised myself I wouldn't cry in front of this man.

He paced slowly back and forth.

"I don't know." So it looked like I wasn't the only one who had trouble dealing with the feelings tumbling en masse. It was so quiet outside, my senses seemed to have heightened. "But I know I can't do it."

It always seemed like this. Like we were talking about two separate things, when it was really all about one thing.

"Can't do it? Can't do what?" I asked with a puzzled expression.

"Let you go."

The words took me aback, and the reality of it knocked me breathless. Suddenly, I wasn't so sure I could handle the no-crying rule anymore. It felt as if any moment from now, my cheeks would glisten from the wetness of my tears.

"But you already have." I stepped forward a tiny bit, admiring the silver glow of the moon and hugged myself. It was getting chilly by the minute. I sucked in a deep breath of fresh air in an effort to calm myself. "I'm not just something you can toss around and pick up because you feel like it."

"The kiss-"

"It was a mistake."

"You still feel the same."

"No, I don't." It was probably useless to deny, but I tried.

"Yes, you do."

"You left me," I snapped bitterly.

"And yet you still do."

"_What do you want to hear?_ That I still love you?" I realized my cheeks brimmed down with traitor tears. "That even after you left me, I'd still be with you?" It seemed like one statement wasn't enough, I blurted them all out, my pent-up feelings flowing freely in the midst of all this mess.

He pulled me into a hug and I was so afraid, so fragile, I could almost feel my heart crack in a thousand vulnerable spots. "I missed you." No, no. Stupid heart.

"I told you, I'm not just something like trash you can throw away. You want me, you're going to treat me like I'm _worth it._"

I turned on my heel and walked away, away from the person that had once hurt me.

-

-

I quickly wiped my tears away- I didn't want to look like I just came from a funeral. I knew sooner or later I'd have to meet Natsume, and the mere thought brought a tightening feeling in my chest. After a few quick "where have you been"s and a few dodging to their questions, there were loud cheers, when I realized the so-called 'after-party' had started. Then people started to dance. I was drinking a cocktail drink when Mr. Narumi, who just arrived, announced, "We ask that the two organizers of the event to dance tonight."

- Then I almost choked on my drink and I spit it out. Everybody stared, but thankfully, my dress didn't get wet.

Everybody expected it, and Mr. Narumi glanced at me with a grin and Koko had a thumbs up. I looked back at Natsume and he held out a hand. In that brief moment of weakness and in the pressure of all the eyes on me, I accepted. Slowly and cautiously, I walked, as he led me in the center of the room, in the center of everyone's attention.

The music turned slower, less rhythmic. He seemed to observe that I was tense. "Just... pretend for ten seconds that I'm someone else."

Pretend he was someone else? How could I do that when I couldn't imagine being this close with someone else? I shut my eyes despite the useless attempt.

"Why did you leave, Natsume?" I said softly, my head resting lightly on his shoulder. Even as everybody watched, I knew they wouldn't hear me.

"I... shouldn't have." I didn't want to hear those words, indirect answers, just like everybody's comforting lies. I broke off the dance, but he caught my wrist. "Where are you going?"

"It was a simple question." I tugged my wrist free, but he blocked my way and stared. Right at me.

There was a pained expression in his face before he answered. "I didn't want to involve you with what I do."

The truth dawned upon me. He wanted to protect me everytime he went to his missions. I didn't know whether to seem grateful or feel irritated, and the mush in my head ignited a spark of anger in me. One I no longer allowed myself to suppress.

"What you do?" I clenched my hands into fists. "_What you do_? I thought we talked about this. I already know all that and_ I don't care_!"

"You say you don't. Each time I leave, somehow, you expect it. I'm not risking a time when you find out I'm-"

"Don't." I turned away from him, unable to form a proper response. "Don't say it." No longer concerned about the stares thrown our direction, I wiped my tears and walked away.

"Mikan, are you okay?" I ignored a concerned Sumire, and walked to... God knew where. Right then, I didn't really care.

-

-

There was an empty playground, and I found comfort on a swing. I sat there for a while, and just... Thought. He left me alone for my sake. He still cared for me. Part of me wanted to rejoice, but for the most part, I was just... broken. Confused. He shouldn't be deciding things for me. Shouldn't I at least get the choice? But no. He ended things between us.

My phone rang, and I yelped in shock. He called. One. Twice. The third time I answered.

"Let's talk."

-

-

It was outside, on the very spot of the confrontation earlier, unable to calm down. I didn't know how to face him. What to say...

"Natsume..." I couldn't find my voice afterwards. Couldn't properly think.

"You wanted me to leave you alone, right?" I remembered when I yelled at him, telling him to leave. _Now you're back and you just won't leave me alone! I'm not anything to you anymore, so why are you still here? _Some piece of me regretted it, wished I kept my mouth shut.

There was a reluctance deep in his eyes. "Then I will. You know I don't want to do this..."

_Then don't..._

"But I didn't think how I would be hurting you each time I go near."

_I'd rather hurt than be without you._

"So... I'll leave."

_Don't go._

"...I'm sorry."

_Not for the second time..._

But my lips wouldn't move. Just tears. Salty tears, a dull aching in my chest, and droplets of rain.

* * *

**Merry Christmas everyone !!!**

**Argh. Poor Mikan. T_T Too much drama in this chapter.  
**

**But this chapter was so fun to write, even if it took me nearly two weeks. Or maybe it _was_ two weeks. Or more. I honestly don't remember when I last updated.**

**Review, anyone?  
**


	7. Temper

**CHAPTER 7- TEMPER**

-

-

(NATSUME- POV)

Wasn't it only a few days ago I swore to myself I'd try to win her back?

But when I read the obvious hurt in her eyes, when I heard the crack on her voice as I realized what I was doing to her, I couldn't bring myself to watch her that way anymore.

She wanted me to leave? Well, I damn well was. I was going to go chasing after someone who apparently didn't want me around. Heck, I was _the_ Natsume Hyuuga. Fans were all over me.

But I didn't want any of them. Not the screaming bunch who'd faint merely ten meters away from me.

_I'll leave._

Probably shouldn't have said that- It wasn't like short notice was going to change anything. But then she wanted me to _leave her alone_, in her exact words, and so I _apologized_-- Probably shouldn't have said that either. It seemed to have triggered something in her, and I've already seen enough of her puffy eyes and red nose. Crying definitely didn't suit her... although I've probably gotten used to it at this point.

It didn't matter if she thought kissing me was a mistake. Or that she didn't like seeing my face. Yet what was I doing, burning the first thing that annoyed me into a crisp? I heard someone clearing their throat behind me and tried to calm my flaming palms.

"Uh, Natsume?"

"What?" I barked, with perhaps, unnecessary harshness. Had it only been, what- only a couple of hours ago? The stupid, clumsy idiot was making me _miss _her.

"I know you may not realize this, but that's your- er- fifth one. I don't think this is a good idea," Ruka told me from behind. "I know you might be tired from all that organizing-"

"Or maybe I just felt like burning things lately." I gave a glare for him to leave me alone. "Go find a new hobby."

"Uh-huh. And then stick you with a tag that says 'highly flammable'?"

"I doubt that'd work. He'd probably just burn the tag," Koko muttered next to him.

"She doesn't want to see me," I said without thought. Huh. So the idiot makes me say stupid things too.

"Wait, so she actually said she doesn't want to see you?" Koko asked.

"I believe it's called rejection. Hotaru does that to me every time. Sometimes I don't even know what the woman wants," Ruka said with a sigh. Right after, his phone rang and he answered it, his eyes widening briefly before he spoke. "Look, I don't think this is a good time to.... But he's already... Well, if you think so, but... But he's- Fine.... Ok, ok. Bye."

He shut his phone and turned to us. "Anyone hungry?"

Red seats, clean and fancy tables- we were brought to one of the common hang-outs of dating couples. The only question was why.

"What the hell are we here for?"

"Uh, oh, there's a- uh, I wanted to order food."

Koko took a thin piece of paper out to me with their 'Specials'.

"How coincidental," I muttered under my breath.

She was sitting next to Tsubasa Andou with a smile that could only mean one thing. And that didn't mean I had to like it.

Before he landed four steps over the place, Ruka let out a deep sigh. "We can go back if you-"

"The idiot's free to date whoever she wants."

"Oh, we believe you," he uttered dryly, and tried to pull Natsume away from the door. In a flash, the strip of paper burnt.

"You're right. I should grill something else."

"Natsume, this is _suicide_. You shouldn't be wasting your Alice like this." There was a worried edge to his voice, but he needn't have worried. I shrugged, feigning nonchalance and turned around like thousands of times before.

"This is_ nothing_."

* * *

-MIKAN'S POV-

The gentle pitter-patter of the rain on the window seemed like the only sound I could hear for hours, drowning out the sounds of celebration and the constant chatter. I didn't know how long I sat there, just staring at the dim sky from the glass window, getting blurry by the minute from the raindrops streaming down like thick blotches of uneven tears.

"Mikan, I don't understand you," Sumire said in the most reasonable voice she could manage. "You're moping because you told him to leave? Nice, you definitely didn't blow it."

I scowled. "I don't know if that's supposed to make me feel any better."

She shook her head in mild amusement. "I hate to tell you this, but I told you so."

Of course she did. And when did I listen?

"I can't believe this whole time he did it all thinking of me." And I blew it.

I stood up and kicked the can nearby, aggravated. Why did he listen to what I said? Why should he stop now? He's been doing a good job of entering my life again. Entering my heart.

It was still his fault. He took my heart and smashed it into pieces, in a situation where he didn't give me the opportunity to choose. Why did he always have to decide things on his own? Did I not get a choice in it, too?

Can't let me go, huh? Well, he just did. Again. It was then that I realized that I was feeling more angry than anything. Funny how I kept feeling that way lately.

"I have an idea," Hotaru murmured, putting down a book she was reading.

"Don't you always?" I muttered silently, shifting my gaze back to the window.

"I already called Ruka. You're coming with us."

"Coming? Where? Please don't tell me this is another partnership."

"It's just a little experiment."

* * *

I didn't understand Hotaru's apparent need to drag me into this place, but I took it as a favor, and so I went on with her 'plans', as usual. Asking her didn't seem to work very well. Which was why it took me aback when I saw a familiar figure, already seated.

"Tsubasa-senpai!" I said in surprise and threw myself in his arms. "Hotaru, what's going on?"

She looked around once, and then stared back at us, calm.

"He wanted some advice on event preparations. Not another partnership, don't worry."

He frowned. "I know I did ask for some advice, but-"

A clearing of throat was heard from the doorway, and we all turned our heads.

"Yes?" Hotaru asked beside me. It was Ruka who entered, face pale.

"Uh, emergency? We need a fire extinguisher."

-

-

Anger flared inside me.

All the pent-up accusations and pleas for him to stay bubbled inside. Like why he always did things on his own. Why he believed he had to protect me. Why can't he stay.

There he was, standing at the end of the street, palms brightly lit. At that instant, all the words burning on my tongue disappeared.

"Polka, " he said in acknowledgement of my presence. Just what did he think he was doing, using his Alice recklessly?

"Why are you here?" I asked, going straight to the point.

"How about you? On a _date_?"

"Date?! I was helping him!" I snapped.

"In _this_ place? Well, you looked cosy in back there." His eyes were distant, impenetrable. I could argue forever and ever with Natsume and it wouldn't resolve anything. Instead, I took a deep breath.

"So? Why do you even care?"

"Itching for me to leave you alone? I'll be gone soon, then."

"Fine! And for the record, I didn't want you to leave. It just... accidentally came out," I finished somewhat lamely. He froze, before he turned back at me.

"_What did you say_?"

"I didn't... It doesn't matter. You're probably all ready and everyth-"

"Tell me," he drew closer, a distinct frown upon his face. I shook my head.

"What for? ...Always doing things, deciding things on your own. You're leaving again."

Because, I knew, despite everything, I wanted him to stay. When he said he'd leave, it was like a fresh wave of pain, tearing me at both ends, mercilessly violent and cruel in manner.

"Women," he muttered finally.

"Excuse me?" I exclaimed, offended.

"You know what, Polka? You make no sense," he said, starting to pace. "You told me to leave. You told me to stop pestering you because I make you _hurt_."

"That was before! I didn't know why you left. I thought you got bored. Liked someone else," I said, finding myself using my hands in the process.

The corners of his lips curved into a tight smile.

"Were you jealous?"

"No!" I turned around and walked back.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked, my path blocked with fire.

"Back. See you never again."

I nullified his fire with ease and walked through like it had been nothing more than the brush of wind.

"How's the fire?" Ruka asked as soon as I went inside.

"More like, how's the firefighter?" Koko chuckled at his own reply.

"Annoyed, so I'll be going then. Sorry, Hotaru, I... have to go..."

She gave a quick nod, and that was all I needed before I left the doors, hearing them swing shut.

-

-

2 days later

I was being followed.

It was probably the footsteps that gave it all away. I pulled my bag closer, getting ready, anticipating any aggressive movement. Ten more steps. Ten steps before I'd turn to hit it across the face of the mysterious stranger who was following me.

Five more. I sucked in a deep breath, getting ready to scream in case I wouldn't be able to handle it and would need help. Then-

I swung my bag back without hesitation and_ WHAM!_

_

* * *

  
_

"Natsume, I know I probably damaged your pretty face, but I can't afford this."

"I said you owed me dinner, not that you'd pay for it."

I frowned. "You mean-"

"Yes. Go back and order."

But my mind was reeling. I wasn't so sure about anything anymore. It made it harder to let go. I wanted to scream at him and at the same time, throw myself into his arms.

"Why... Why are you doing this?"

"Don't you like farewell dinners?"

"No, I don't."

He paused for a fraction of a second before he said, "I've decided-"

"That you're leaving and never coming back, because really-"

"Mikan, I'm staying."

"You'd just be doing it agai... Did you... did you just say..." Tears clouded my vision. "Natsume, this isn't funny."

Wasn't it only a few days ago he said he was leaving? I couldn't understand how the feeling of relief and happiness flooded through me on an instant.

"I thought you'd be happy. I didn't realize you'd be crying so much," he said with a frown.

"You're ... not leaving?"

"Depends. Maybe you'd like to repeat the part that you wanted me to stay...?"

I picked up the menu, and grinned. Paying for me, was he?

"I want a lamb rack, Grilled haloumi lasagne, Veal scallopine, Sweet bread empanada, Bruschetta, Baked vanilla custard, sandwiched with hazelnut praline wafers, toffee and caramel sauces."

* * *

**I've had a finish/not finish argument with this story. In the end, I decided to just end it. Thanks for the reviews everyone. It was fun writing this fic. =]**

**Review, anyone?**


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